Self-esteem is essential for happiness. Joy is dependent on a feeling that one is worthwhile, that one’s life has purpose, and there is significance to ones existence in the universe.
Here are some consequences of low self-esteem and how it impedes on happiness from Let Us Make Man by Rabbi Abraham J. Twersky
Anxiety:
People who have the sense of worthlessness, experience a morbid fear that they are undeserving of joy and that even when they do feel joy it will only be short-lived. So occasions that should result in happiness, produce anxiety instead.
People pleaser:
People who fear that they are unlikable, try to buy friendship. They always say “yes” in fear of losing affection and friendship. As a result they carry a great deal of resentment within themselves and are angry that others are takin advantage of them.
Ill-equipped to deal with everyday stresses:
People who consider themselves inadequate, can perceive many normal stress situations as being overwhelming, not because the challenges are actually so big, but because they feel to inadequate to cope with them.
Overly sensitive:
People with a negative self-image, may develop a type of paranoia, understanding even benign remarks as insults, and exaggerating any remark or action which maybe be even remotely critical of them.
Based on the above, a key to happiness is humility. But the Jewish concept of humility is fundamentally novel.
Be sure to catch me next week as we discuss the unique Jewish approach to humility.
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