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The Art of Self-mastery
Much of what we want for our children to achieve is unattainable without the art of self-mastery. Take happiness for example: A person who is enslaved to their impulses, bad desires or addictions cannot be truly happy.
The Lubavitcher Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem M. Schneerson said regarding education: “The whole point of education is to change the child’s habitual nature. Children, by nature, do whatever they see fit, without any restraints…..Children must therefore be taught to set boundaries and change their habitual natures, until they attain sovereignty of mind over heart.”
Education is about teaching our children the art of self-mastery. This sort of education is of the utmost importance and is multifaceted. It includes, but is not limited to, the ability to delay gratification and the ability to focus without being distracted. These elements are crucial to success in every area of life - materially, socially, intellectually, morally and spiritually.
The key is discipline. Not discipline in a sense of punishment, but discipline in a sense of self control.
We can train our children to act in a disciplined way by pushing them beyond their comfort zones. We need to set a high standard for them and insist that they reach it, even (and especially) when they protest and proclaim that the standard or goal is not within their reach.
Every time a child learns discipline, he or she is moved one step closer to being a mature human being and is empowered to repeat the process again and again. But most importantly, the more disciplined our children are, the more of a happy and content life they will live.